Uncertainty is the root of all evil for most anxiety sufferers. But what many people fail to realize is that setting things in stone can be just as terrifying for us. After all, when things are confirmed, we have an obligation and our anxiety doesn’t always make us the best, most reliable person, unfortunately.
Just think about how many times you’ve had to cancel plans with a friend, call into work sick, bail on a major event such as a wedding or worse, turn down an awesome opportunity like being in your best friends wedding simply because you have anxiety.
For some anxiety sufferers, having every step planned out is ideal, but for others such as myself, planning ahead means that we have way too much time to over-think the situation. So, for the anxiety sufferers out there who can’t seem to commit for fear of overanalyzing, you aren’t alone.
The only thing worse than an anxiety attack is having tons of time to overanalyze the impending doom of one. Making plans is like giving your anxiety a head start in a race towards panic. You have all of this time to think of the 101 things that could go wrong, and just as much time to come up with ways to cancel.
Oh, and that’s just the beginning. You then start to worry about having to cancel, the disappointment of your friends and family, and the emotional turmoil that comes with letting your anxiety attacks control your plans.
To others, making plans sets a fun activity in place. For anxiety sufferers, it sends us into a week-long panic.
Starting New Relationships
Starting new relationships is hands-down one of by biggest anxiety triggers, which is odd because I am extremely outgoing and social. But for some reason, having new people in my life who don’t understand my anxiety just sends me running for the hills in panic.
There’s something about new relationships that anxiety sufferers struggle with. We fear the judgment, disappointment and potential loss of losing someone, and it is always about the loss at all. Instead, if we lose someone new in our life as a result of our panic attacks, or rather, someone else’s lack of understanding, we feel defeated – and that’s only the beginning.
After the feelings of defeat, we feel totally and completely f@cked up, useless and abnormal. So what do most of us anxiety sufferers do? We put up a giant wall to protect ourselves from new relationships.
Relationships, In General
It isn’t just new relationships that anxiety sufferers struggle with. Basically, any relationship can send our anxiety into a tailspin for the exact same reasons that new relationships can. It’s all about the fear of judgment, disappointment, and loss. We start to think about how we’ll end up alone for the rest of our lives because of our anxiety.
Any Form of Commitment
Lastly, any form of commitment sends anxiety sufferers into a frenzy. Commitment means that we are obligated to do something, regardless of how we are feeling. When you suffer from anxiety, you can’t predict how you’ll feel from one day to the next. Some mornings you wake up perfectly fine, and other mornings, you can barely find the motivation to get out of bed. Some days, we just don’t feel like we can function, attend, participate, love, etc. and when we commit to something, the fear of disappointment begins.
However, there is one thing that all anxiety sufferers seem to forget. We have this fear of disappointment and loss as a result of our anxiety, but the reality is that we aren’t at a loss if someone gets mad, frustrated or takes off because of our anxious state.
No one deserves to have someone in their life that gets up and walks away or who gets upset because of your anxiety. It’s the exact same as someone getting mad or breaking up with someone because they have cancer. Anxiety is a disease, and if someone doesn’t want to be in your life because of that, you’re better off without them.
Did I miss a commitment fear that only anxiety sufferers understand?
Tell me in the comment section below.