My Story

Anxiety, Please Go Away

August 29, 2014
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The heat begins to rise from my feet to my head,

And well throughout every inch of my body.

I start to tremble and uncontrollably shake.

My mind is filled with thoughts about what is going to happen next.

Should I run, or should I stay?

No… I should run!

What if I stay right here right now?

Where do I run? Where do I go?

What do I say?

What if…

What if…

My mind is a blizzard of fearful thoughts.

I can’t think straight.

Or make a decision that might make things alright.

My heart is still beating a thousand beats a second,

And I see everyone staring,

What are they thinking?

Can they see me?

Or my face turning red?

Am I starting to sweat?

Do I look wet?

What if I get sick, right here, right now?

What would I do?

What would they say?

What would they think.

What if…

What if…

I can’t move.

My body is frozen in a state of fear.

I hate it, I hate it.

Please, just go away.

Now, please, just disappear.

***

And eventually the feelings begin to subside

As I start to relax and take some time.

I think about what happened, and when will it happen next.

When will this nightmare begin?

What if it happens right now?

What if…

What if…

And it’s that constant train of unrealistic fears,

Silly to you, but frightening for me.

It may seem absurd, but nerves are for real as they travel throughout my entire body.

The sensations flow frequently,

As unpleasant as they are.

Why won’t they stop?

Do I have to live in fear?

What will it come next?

What if…

What if…

 

I wrote this poem when I was in the midst of feeling extreme anxiety. Writing has always been an excellent way for me to released my emotions and calm myself down. You should give it a shot sometime.

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