My Story Sexual Abuse

Blaming The Victim of Sexual Abuse

July 27, 2015
sexual abuse, child abuse, emotional abuse, domestic violence, sexual assault

As many of you know, my older sister was a victim of child abuse by a family member when she was a young girl. I was only 5 or 6 at the time, but my memory is very prominent with the actions that followed after this very devastating experience for her; from a man she once trusted. I am speaking about her situation, by my very own choice and with her permission, to help raise awareness and let other people know that they too, no longer have to suffer in silence.

It is okay to speak about the child abuse you experienced and/or are experiencing.

Unfortunately, ever since I decided to speak about my family situation, my sister has been treated extremely poorly and being blamed for doing the video.  For starters, she isn’t talking about it – I am, and I am prepared for the harassment that was expected as per previous actions from certain individuals. However, what disgusts me is that even if my sister did choose to do a video and speak publicly about the sexual assault she experienced, what difference would it make to those who seem to be still blaming her for her being molested.

It almost seems like people are mad at my sister for being molested; like she asked for it or something. Despite the perpetrator being convicted to sexual abuse, the wrath is still being directed to her. Why? Because she wasn’t the victim… It has somehow been flipped that the predator and his supporters are the true victims of this awful experience.

child sexual assault, My sister can’t even call some people to tell them about her gorgeous new baby girl without certain individuals bringing up the video that I did pertaining to child abuse. Let me repeat that, the video that I did. They won’t speak to me about it, but feel like it is okay to slam my sister and blame her for something she didn’t do. Something she has never had any responsibility for… Other than simply being the real victim here.

The saddest part of all of this is that this is daily life for so many other victims out there. They either don’t tell someone of their situation in fear of being harassed by people who are supposed to “love” you,  or they speak up and have everyone who is supposed to be supporting them, turn it around.

It is so important to never let the fear of finally speaking up outweigh the benefits of standing your ground against your non-believers, non-supporters and perpetrator. Every time you think of hiding your secret for another second longer, think of the relief and happiness that can follow when you finally seek the support and help you need from dealing with such a traumatic experience. As for my sister,  she is having an extremely hard time dealing with the backlash she is receiving from the video that she didn’t even have anything to do with, but she does support my decision to raise awareness in hopes of saving potential victims of the future, and promote healing for those currently suffering.

Those who don’t support the child who was a victim will have to live with that for the rest of their lives.

You deserve to have your story heard. Don’t let fear of bad people interrupt your path to freedom.

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