I have no idea what is going on with my anxiety disorder lately. I have always felt like I had a firm grip on my panic attacks, and then you have that ‘one’. Oh, you know exactly what I’m talking about. Just when you think that you have finally learned how to cope with anxiety for an eternity, your anxiety disorder throws you into a bundle of surprise panic attacks.
This is exactly what happened to me a couple of weeks ago, and as any panic attacks sufferers, you know that all it takes is for one attack of anxiety disorder for everything that you have learned about how to cope with anxiety to go completely out the window. Well, this is exactly what happened to me – and man, did it ever get me down in the dump.
It is so evil – the fact that we could be anxiety disorder free for years, never experiencing one small dose of panic attacks and then suddenly, the slightest feelings of anxiety can immediately bring you back to the beginning of it all. Instantly, everything you have learned has been forgotten, and the fact that you just went anxiety-free for years doesn’t matter.
It’s pure evil.
Unfortunately, I did what we all tend to do when this happens and totally got sucked right into it. This is the absolute opposite. Instead, what I should have done – and what I will certainly do from this point forward is:
- Realize that it is just a feeling
- Remember that I have learned how to cope with anxiety
- Practice the tools that I have to overcome the panic attacks
- Tell myself I am totally not going to let 1 day or 1 episode of anxiety disorder take all of my progress away from me
It is no secret that the feelings of an anxiety disorder are absolutely terrifying. If you’ve never had it, you simply won’t understand it. This is another thing you need to learn – some people just won’t understand it. It is so easy to get completely shaken up with a random, out-of-nowhere, “I thought I was over my anxiety” episode, and it’s also totally normal to be like, “Holy shit – where’d you come from?”
However, the most important thing is how we go about it afterward. I didn’t do so well. I slipped into that dark hole pretty damn fast. Why let one day totally ruin everything that you have worked so hard to achieve and all the progress that you have made? One episode of panic attacks out of 365 days is something to be proud of – and not something to be ruined over.
I think it is also important to remember that we will forever experience the symptoms of panic attacks. We just need to focus on the tools we have that will calm those sensations – and over time, we won’t fear them. It is totally normal to experience the feelings of your anxiety disorder. It all has to do with how we let them make us feel and react.