As you read through my intro to my 13 hidden messages found within the Netflix series’, 13 Reasons Why message, you’ll quickly notice that I see beyond what meets the eye. I don’t see Thirteen Reasons Why for what it is but rather, for what it is secretly telling its vulnerable audience. So, if you’re ready to find out what’s on the second side of the tape of hidden messages, read on, my friends, read on.
Here is the second secret hidden within the 13 Reasons Why message.
Tape 2: Absolutely no accountability for her actions
Suicide is some kind of awful; a type of awful few people can relate to. It’s the decision to end absolutely everything in your life – every relationship, friendship, emotion, memory, feeling, hobby, happiness, family, holidays, events, etc. Absolutely everything ends when you decide to take your own life. Let me say that again – when you decide to take your own life.
No one else is responsible for your own choices
But the 13 Reasons Why message may have you convinced otherwise; it may have you convinced that suicide isn’t your choice and that it’s everyone else’s fault.
The main character, Hannah, decides to end her life but well throughout the episodes that reveal the 13 Reasons Why main message, no where does she take accountability for her actions. It is everyone else’s fault, and I understand where the character is coming from but at the end of the day, no one made her commit suicide.
She chose suicide.
Now, I know that’s a rough statement to hear. When mental health is involved, suicide is rarely seen as a choice but rather, it’s the only way out of such pain and misery. However, there’s always options available – you just have to choose them.
You can choose to find treatment, you can choose to ignore what people are saying, you can choose to report the bullying, you can choose to stand up for yourself, you can choose to get off social media to stop the cyber bullying, and you can choose to take an action today so that your life and your mental health get better.
And it will. Life always gets better once you choose that for yourself.
You can choose to change your situation
No one choses your destiny for you. People may make your life an absolute living hell but what you decide to do about it is 100% your responsibility.
Now, hear me out. I completely understand that the things Hannah went through are awful, which is what the 13 Reasons Why message was about. After all, people are evil. They say unkind things; they spread terrible rumours; and they treat others even worse. Humans are inarguably the worst species in this world.
But there are good people and there are good moments, and there is a future to look forward to.
The things that happen to you as a child aren’t your fault, but what you choose to do about it is 100% your choice. As my mom always says, “If you aren’t happy with your situation, change it.” This is much easier said than done and the options are limited when you’re still a child or teenager but there are still options.
You can choose to end your life and never get another chance to experience life for what it’s really worth, or you can take your terrible experiences and turn them into something positive.
Choosing change when dealing with school bullies
Choosing life can sometimes be difficult especially when you’re so far down deep in the black hole of depression. This is even more true when you’re still in school.
School can be absolutely unbearable and kids can be terribly cruel. I once had girls throw acne cream packets at me for a week because I had pimples on my nose. It felt like the world was crumbling beneath me every day they did this to me. I begged my mom to home-school me, I didn’t want to go to school, I thought the world was over… But it wasn’t. It was just a moment in time that I now look back on and realize how stupid it was. Heck, I should have thanked them for throwing acne cream at me because clearly, what I wasn’t using wasn’t working.
Seriously though, the slightest bit of bullying sucks. This was a truly awful time for me but I chose to continue to go to school (with a bit of forcing from my parents). I chose to stick up for myself; I chose to ignore the mean girls; I chose to walk through those hallways with my pimple-covered nose held high; I chose to get through it.
At the end of the day, school is such a small portion of your life. As soon as you’re done high school, you get to be whoever you want, say whatever you want, do whatever you want. You just have to get through those 4 years and then life is in the palm of your hands. So, choose 4 awful years and you can have 40 good ones.
You are responsible for how you handle situations
With that said, you are 100% responsible for how you handle situations. This is a concept the 13 Reasons Why message completely avoids. The things Hannah went through are horrible. But the Netflix series teaches its audience that if you commit suicide, it’s everyone else’s fault. Sure, people definitely contributed to the problem that lead her to suicide but as she went through the tapes, everyone else was to blame for her death. No where did she say she killed herself. Everyone else did, and this is not accurate nor fair.
Everyone else killed Hannah except for Hannah herself
The 13 Reasons Why message tells people that if you commit suicide, it isn’t your problem. Instead, it’s everyone else’s problem because ultimately, they’re the ones who killed you. And this is wrong. You are 100% responsible for your own actions. No one else has the power to make such a drastic decision for someone else.
In no way am I making excuses for the way people treat others. However, in no way should someone feel like they are forced to commit suicide because of the things they’re going through. Life is a choice. I know that it doesn’t always seem that way and that it feels like life will never get better, but it will. Life always gets better. You just have to choose it.
If you or someone you know is suffering, please contact the Canadian National Suicide Helpline.
Come back tomorrow for the third hidden message in 13 Reasons Why main message, or “Like” my page on Anxiety Gone Facebook so you don’t a miss