For many anxiety warriors, the idea that an internal imbalance in the body, whether hormonal or energetic, is causing the uncomfortable symptoms is never a thought. I, too, was one of those people. But then my healing journey began which proved that balancing your energy for anxiety relief is very much possible.
My Anxiety Trigger: The Need for External Validation
Hi, I’m Logan (@Self_Love_Junkie) and my struggle with anxiety started long before I ever knew there was a name for it. I vividly remember the need for external validation as early as my elementary years when I’d bring home report cards with all A’s in excited anticipation of praise from my parents. And even more vividly, in those instances when A’s weren’t the outcome, I would hide in shame from the underlying truth that I was far from perfect.
I didn’t realize it then, but those early experiences were conditioning me to base my entire worth and identity on my ability to achieve and elicit outside praise from others. Without those achievements and external forces driving me forward, I was nothing. I had nothing. I meant nothing.
For years, I continued to live like this; I needed the highest marks on everything, and all the awards there were to give out. In high school, I took the hardest classes available while also working almost 30 hours nights and weekends… All because I felt like I needed to prove something to everyone else.
The pattern continued into college when just taking classes wasn’t enough; I had to throw a wedding, a baby, rent and bills into the mix while juggling 3 jobs… and then graduate with a 4.0 gpa magna cum laude.
Even now as I type this all out, I get a surge of power knowing someone will read this and think, “Damn, this girl is good.” But despite all the praise and attention my achievements garnered, what they were really earning me was a hefty load of stress and anxiety that was fueled by the constant need to succeed, and the unbearable shame and guilt when I didn’t. Because without the praise, I was nothing…. Or so my anxiety wanted me to believe. I had to achieve to earn praise in order to have value. The pattern was toxic and it was destroying my self-confidence and leading to a whole host of mental and physical issues.
Breaking Free of My Anxiety Trigger
So how did I break it? First, I tried all the face masks and bubble baths you can imagine. I slapped on bandaid after bandaid, hoping that something would make me feel whole and worthy, while also stopping the ensuing panic attacks and incessant need to climb and achieve.
Until one day when someone introduced me to the concept of masculine and feminine energies, and my life changed forever.
Balancing your Energy for Anxiety Relief
All beings, regardless of physicality, posses both masculine and feminine energies.
Masculine tendencies include: achievement, structure, rigidity, progress, logic, gain, risk, force, and assertiveness.
Feminine tendencies include: flow, alignment, intuition, creativity, patience, compassion, grace, sensitivity, and surrender.
Do you recognize yourself all in one or the other?
Both masculine and feminine energies have their own pros and cons, and an imbalance in either can result in burnout, stress, anxiety, and an overall lack of ease and wellness.
I was stuck in the masculine; the drive to constantly achieve was creating crippling anxiety throughout my entire life and being. So to swing the pendulum and ultimately balance the scales, I had to tap into my Divine Feminine.
Tapping into the Divine Feminine To Start Balancing Your Energy for Anxiety Healing
Below is a list of the various ways you can start balancing your energy for anxiety relief if you feel like you’re stuck in either a masculine or feminine energy.
- Dance: The essence of the Divine Feminine is sensuality and fluidity, flexibility and allowing. So the first way I began to embody Her was by allowing my body to move in whatever ways it wanted. Sometimes that meant swaying my hips gently side-to-side and others it meant twerking up a storm to the latest Beyonce album. Whatever movement my body craved, I allowed.
- Intuitive Living: Intuition is another huge element of the Diving Feminine, and until this point my life had been designed specifically to quiet my intuition. I allowed only logic and reason to characterize my thoughts and decisions, leaving my intuition to waste away in the depths of my soul. So I began tapping into it through meditation, journaling exercises, getting quiet, reacting on gut instincts before my brain had the chance to rationalize them. I abandoned the structure of religion and opted instead for the expansiveness of spirituality. No longer was I confined by what I could see; instead I was set free by what I could feel.
- Speak like a Goddess: I used to always say things like, “I’m just not that girly.” Hell, I can recount numerous times referring to my body type as “linebacker material”. That kind of language destroys the Diving Feminine and causes Her to retreat. So I began speaking to and about myself in ways that honored my female form. I took my time getting dressed in front of my mirror instead of averting my eyes away from my naked body. I honored every part of my own Diving Feminine, the Goddess within, through my words, thoughts, and actions to call Her back from the depths I’d once sent Her to.
- Dress like a Goddess: I’m not a huge fan of shopping, mind you, so this one was a little challenging, but I know what I like and I allowed that to guide me. I went out and bought a few power outfits for myself. My favorite one is a pair of black leggings, a nude tank top, and a soft pink kimono that flows when I walk. I pair that with my favorite earth tone bracelets and a necklace, brush the tangles out of my hair, and walk like a Goddess everywhere I go.
- Permission to Feel: Lastly, I gave myself permission to feel. Emotion is decidedly feminine, and as someone who operated so heavily in the masculine I spent my life avoiding all emotion, both good and bad. As a result I lived life in a very neutral state; I wasn’t ever really upset or sad, but I also wasn’t ever really excited or happy. Extreme emotion in either direction felt very unsafe to me and my masculine tendencies. So I gave myself permission to feel whatever came up at any given moment. I reminded myself that emotions are beautiful and natural and serve a purpose in our growth and evolution as humans. This unleashed a whole new level of power for my Diving Feminine as She began experiencing the vast spectrum that is human emotion.
How Healing My Divine Feminine Helped Conquer My Anxiety
Most of you are likely wondering how healing my Divine Feminine allowed me to conquer my anxiety, you ask? After all, what does being and feeling feminine has to do with anxiety. If you’re new to energy healing, you’re probably sitting there thinking what?! So, allow me to break it down for you.
Balancing my Divine Feminine Energy gave me permission to stop striving and seeking. It reminded me of my worth outside of my achievements while also reconnecting me to my own divinity and forced me to get quiet and be present. Balancing my energies gave me value devoid of external validation. It set me free, and my hope is that it can do the same for you. So I challenge you to get quiet and assess your own energies.
Are you operating in a heavy masculine state? Or maybe you’re on the other end and rely too heavily on the feminine. Both can contribute to feelings of stress and anxiety. I highly suggest learning ways you can start balancing your energy for anxiety relief and of course, self-love and self confidence. Gain awareness of what drives you and question the origin of your anxiety. Maybe the Divine Feminine can set you free too.
Thanks for your time, friend.
Find Logan on IG @self_love_junkie or on Facebook @Logan Rebecca.
Soulful Girl’s Digital Dorn Room: https://www.facebook.com/groups/903859376633051/
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