You’ve probably heard of the phrase ‘You are an accumulation of the five people you spend the most time with’. And I totally agree – your vibe attracts your tribe, and it’s important to create an environment, which supports, honours, loves and encourages you throughout your journey on earth. But there’s something missing… No one ever references the one person who you spend ALL of your time with. YOU! So today, we’ll be diving into finding your authentic self and becoming your own best friend.
Why is Finding Your Authentic Self Important?
You are with yourself 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Your relationship with yourself sets the precedent for all your other relationships, but also your reality in terms of your career and life in general. So why do we not focus more on ourselves?
Finding your authentic self requires you to really dive deep into who you are; who you are when the ego is put to rest and the pressures from society and the opinions of others are silenced. The truth is, most people have never even thought about finding their authentic self because we all spend so much time and energy focused on what other people need, do, want, love, hate etc. These are the things that make us who we are… At least, that’s what the ego wants you to think.
Finding Your Authentic Self: Questions to Ask
To begin your journey towards finding your authentic self, take some time to ask yourself the following questions and see if you’re able to answer them, in depth, straight away?
- Who am I?
- What do I like?
- What do I dislike?
- What do I need?
- What are my self-limited blocks?
- What are my strengths?
- What are my weaknesses?
- How do I like to be treated?
- How can I meet my own emotional needs?
It’s not that easy is it?
What Does It Mean to Find Your True Self?
Hi gorgeous, my name is Megs and I’m a Self-Confidence & Mindset Strategist for soul-centred female coaches looking to create a profitable, aligned and successful coaching business. And this is one of THE most common aspects among female entrepreneurs and their lack of self-worth. I work with so many women who, due to their lack of self-love, are blocking their own happiness, abundance and success. The minute they get out of their own way, CRAZY amazing things start to happen and their life-changes dramatically. And that’s what I want to teach you how to do.
How to Start Finding Your Authentic Self?
To improve your self-confidence so that you can step into the empowering and confident version of yourself, there are many things you can do. For starters, you need to shift the focus back on you. Connect with who you are, what you need and how you can support yourself the most. Because if you don’t do it, no one else will and it therefore removes the emotional crutch that you often place on other people to meet your own needs. Here are some additional ways to find your higher self:
1. Become your own best friend
Remember all of those times when your best friend has rung you in a flood of tears because her ex is dating someone new. Or she’s sent you a million messages ranting about some nasty co-worker who yet again has tried to show her upfront of the office? You consoled her, you gave her a new perspective that she hadn’t thought of before. You helped her see the positive light at the end of the tunnel and you told her it would all be ok. Right? Exactly.
I want you to do the same for yourself. When you’re going through a hard time, a crisis at work or perhaps at home, ask yourself ‘What can I do to make you feel better?’ ‘What do you need from me?’ ‘How can I help you?’. You simply put yourself in third person and interact with yourself as you would your best friend.
The person who needs you to be there for her the most, is you.
2. Celebrate yourself more often
As human beings we have a strong tendency to only focus on what we haven’t done well, what we haven’t achieved, what we should have done instead, how badly we messed up etc. All this does is serves you with a million self-limiting stories of why you’re not good enough… or so you think.
What was the last thing you did that you feel really proud of? If this is a difficult question to ask, and you’re racking your brains trying to remember something, you my love need to commit to practising this the most.
Start keeping a journal or a log of every win, every accomplishment, every goal achieved, every fear faced, no matter how big or small you think it is. It doesn’t matter. What this forces your mind to do is search for the positive and focus on how much value you bring.
Take screenshots of messages from friends, family, loved ones who have thanked you or admired a certain quality about you. You then have this beautiful tracker of all the amazing ways you have contributed to the world around you and why you are talented, kind, special, and loved.
Refer back to this every time you’re feeling like you have nothing to give to the world… because you ABSOLUTELY DO!
3. Self-value + giving more = receiving more
This is the formula I live my life by.
When you take the time to actively value yourself, you raise your vibrational frequency. When you take the time to FEEL good, you match with abundance. And who doesn’t want to feel good and receive more abundance?
Life is a journey you share with yourself first, and then with others. And when you can get the balance right between honouring, loving and looking after yourself as well as others, you’ll be onto a winner. Life will flow so much more effortlessly. You will create and manifest incredible opportunities you never thought were possible, and you’ll start to truly LIVE.
Take it from me, a former people-pleaser and self-loather, the most powerful gift you could ever give yourself is your own love and appreciation. Everything after that is a bonus.
Sending you so much love your way!
By Megan Nicola www.megannicola.co.uk
Facebook: www.facebook.com/megannicolacoach or personal https://www.facebook.com/megan.n.airey
Photography: Martyna Przybysz
- Your Vibes Attract Your Tribe: Finding Your Authentic Self - August 2, 2019